‘I’m looking for the words and writing for those who can’t imagine the words.’

Mark Meynell articulates a heart pain that most of us simply couldn’t express. He connects strongly and immediately with fellow cave dwellers. We relive significant moments from boarding school, Uganda, Berlin and London. We visit the Psalms, Job and The Pilgrim’s Progress.

If you’re after neat conclusions and a fair-weather faith, this is not for you. This book serves up gritty reality and raw honesty, but also the heartfelt hope that the author’s brokenness ‘can somehow contribute to another person’s integration’ and ‘inspire their clinging while beset by darkness or fog or blizzards’.


‘Mark invites fellow cave-dwellers and those who love us to walk (or collapse) with him on the road . . . For the first time in a long while, we rest.’ Zack Eswine

‘Moving and fascinating.’ Sean Fletcher

‘Fine writing, personal honesty, intellectual analysis, theological incisiveness and simple open-endedness . . . A must-buy and a must-read.’ Julian Hardyman

‘Written straight from the heart of pain – yet brimful of hope and courage.’ Rachel Kelly

‘We are pointed to a Saviour who brings us purpose, grace and hope.’ Emma Scrivener

‘Practical wisdom and hope . . . without being trite.’ Derek Tidball

‘Profound, unusual and very personal . . . demonstrates the extraordinary relevance and power of the Bible in helping us to connect our often mysterious and confusing experiences to God’s bigger story. Mark’s creative appendix of music, books, poetry, websites and blogs, which have helped him survive his “cave”, is invaluable.’ Richard Winter


About The Author

Mark Meynell is Director for Langham Preaching and Langham Partnership (Europe and Caribbean). For nine years, until 2014, he worked on the Senior Ministry team at All Souls Langham Place, London. Previously he had been involved in student ministry and taught biblical studies at a seminary in Kampala, Uganda. He blogs at Quaerentia. He is married to Rachel and they have two teenage children.

When Darkness Seems My Closest Friend is published by Inter-Varsity Press and can be purchased by CLICKING HERE




Our audiobooks download as zipped files (due to their size and for your convenience). Once unzipped you will find all of the mp3 files for your audiobook named, and in correct file order.  Due to the way Apple has designed iOS, iPhones and iPads don’t recognise these zip files automatically (unlike Android devices).  So, if you buy one of our titles via your iPhone or iPad, there are two ways to find and listen to your files:

[1] Download for FREE iZip for iOS – then download the audiobook using the link provided either on the webpage or the email we sent you. After the file has downloaded click on the Open With option and choose iZip. The app will open and ask if you want it to unzip all the files, say yes. A minute or so later you will have a list of mp3 files in order, and you just need to tap on the one you want to play and it will start playing in the Audioplayer. You can easily play, pause, jump forward or back.

[2] Slightly easier – download the zip file to your PC or MAC, unzip it to a folder you know the location of (such as your Music or Documents folder), then use iTunes to transfer the files in the same way you would a music album.

We hope you enjoy your audiobook and come back for more soon!


Mark Meynell


Mark Meynell


Morrison Ellis



File Size/Quality

192kbps (better than CD), 256kbps (superb quality), 320kbps (highest quality)


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